Every couple months or so I start questioning my life and where its going....I wonder if I'm doing the right thing pursuing my illustration and in the way that I'm going about it. Most illustrators I imagine do what they do but also have to do other things to pay their bills whether it is teaching, etsy, a part-time gig, day-job, what-not. I think there are also the uber-illustrators that have a lot of licensing deals and gallery shows that actually make a nice living off of what they do but I think they are exceptions. I have goals and dreams for where I want to take my illustration and it requires that I spend a lot of time sketching, painting, day-dreaming, reading, and looking: I need time. So my situation right now is ideal: I freelance and work part-time. It seems like an enviable existence what with leisurely mornings and fun projects and it is great: I can't complain! Sometimes I can't believe how lucky I am but in the back of my mind I wonder whether I'm doing enough with my life. I can usually shut away the questions when I'm busy but anytime there is a lull or I see an interesting job posting I wonder whether this is all I'm meant to do. Will I ever grow up and enter the "real" world? I daydream about having a corporate job and wearing nice work clothes...But then I look at other illustrators around me and that's all they do. As in they seem to accept it as their job/career/life. They are consumed by it. And it's true even if I work 24/7 I would never have enough time to create in the way that I want to. I have to have enough time to work on freelance and private projects and I doubt I could do that if I had a normal 9-5.....and yet I still wonder.....I don't know. Thoughts, insight and advice are welcome. :-)
**thank you, teri and chris for your encouraging words. teri, you're work is really great btw!!
2 comments:
draw forever!
hey Esther, I've been reading your blog from time to time, but this is the first time I'm leaving a comment.
well, I'm a starting illustrator as well, and I'd say "starting" although I've graduated from school 6 years ago because I haven't really tried promoting myself as an illustrator. I got a full-time day job as a fashion/graphic designer, which pays very well, but then I don't get to draw as often as I want to, and it feels like my dream of becoming a professional illustrator is fading away. sometimes I can't go to sleep because of it.
so I think you're in a happy place. as long as you're not too desperate for money, don't do it.
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